Almost as Scary as Karaoke

I stepped out of my box Sunday and started telling people I know about my blog.  Whew that was hard.  I think I drove my husband nuts…should I, shouldn’t I.  Now, or later…how about now?  Maybe later?  I know I drove myself nuts on Sunday.

I typically don’t like exposing myself to people I know, not that I expose my self to strangers either.  Don’t get me wrong, I talk a lot, share my feelings a lot, and brag about my family a lot.  But if I am going to be in an exposed position, like talking in front of a lot of people, sharing the blog, singing Karaoke (which I will never do by the way) I prefer it to be to people I don’t know.  People I don’t see or will not see again because they are strangers.  In high school and college I even took lower grades on assignments to not have to get in front of the class.  I could get in front of a bunch of total strangers….but not someone who I will have to talk to later, terrifying.

So seeing people after they hold my heart in their hands is uncomfortable, to say the least.   The only thing worse that comes to mind is singing in front of others (I sometimes even mouth “happy birthday” instead of sing it).

I have to confess, I shared this blog for purely selfish reasons…it is hard to keep secrets, especially one that is out there for anyone to find.  My dad uses this same site for his blog for goodness sake.   Plus I was stiff and tense and I convinced myself it was the stress of keeping this secret (still waiting for the shoulders to relax).  I kept wondering when I would get caught and how would they feel knowing I had shared this with some family members and not others.  So, see purely selfish.

I don’t know exactly what I was expecting, but imagine my surprise when some thanked me for this gift.  That felt weird.  I should be thanking them for letting me unburden myself on them.  Thank you, they said, a gift they called it…huh. That is a wonderful surprise.  And lucky too since if they did not like this “gift” they can’t return it, re-gift it, erase it from their memory or even use it as a white elephant.

Lucky me to have such great family and friends.

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